About my camming days

I wanna to tell how I actually got into that field and what I feel bout that.
First I've discovered about webcamming back in 2004, I was a student and one of my friend told bout this exciting job where u can improve ur english,meet cool guys and same time make tons of money!I've tried to do that for a month or so and didn't really had a success.I can't say I was shy or felt that I was doing smth wrong but I was bored to death lol! I didnt really like to get nakey and go pvts but I loved  to chat and make new friends.But as u guessed it didnt really bring me any profit.So I left.My friend though became popular,even created her own site,met a guy online and they got married:) Now they live happily in AU and just had a baby. The true real Cinderella Story :) (I'll post some pics from those camming times later)
And the second chance I gave to this "occupation" this summer when moved with my new bf to another state.I didnt have any friends,job or anything to get me busy.So I've decided to go online first of all for fun and at least some interaction with people and second, for some extra cash for myself.I've opened up an account at MFC in May but was broadcasting in general just about 10-12 times since then...I don't know why but I feel weird and scared to go online 8/ And every time I force myself but find an excuse not to do that - sick, feel tired, partied the whole night, mom is home, camera is not working, the light sucks and so on. WHY??? What I'm scared of????I can't find any explanation even for myself!And now my camscore is sooooooo low but it's not because I'm that bad (actually I made lots of fans just for those 10 times broadcasting) but cuz most of the time I'm just having fun, talking and not doing any prvts or groups (dont know why still feel weird bout that).If I'm doing shows I never ask for tips :/ I always rely on the members' conscience. Though I've realized very fast it's toooooo many free loaders out there...So here I am, a girl who wants to make camming her full time job but who scared to death to go online :/ Help 8(